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Rev Dr VP Langer-Langer

Ask Rev. Dr. V. Pickle Langer-Langer, a social/cultural scientist, on today’s issues and inanities

Dear Dr Langer-Langer,


My daughter is in high school and wants to be on the track team. There are two boys who identify as girls and dominate nearly all the events and are being celebrated as heroes (heroines?) by all, including a creepy ambitious coach. My daughter and I are both confused. What should I do? Signed, Confused Dad


Dear Confused Dad,


First, it’s Reverend Doctor, thank you very much.


Second, you and your daughter are caught in the culture wars of a bunch of idiots.


I suggest you find a sport where only real, actual girls compete. You know, girls who have had menstrual cycles and been treated like second class citizens by boorish men. Unless she can kick field goals; then by all means put her on the boys’ team. But I digress.


Absent that, stick to intellectual pursuits. Girls are generally better anyway.


The transgender life is something that adults can explore, experiment, agree, or disagree. Responsible medical authority speaks mostly of caution.


But it is serious business, and not for children to decide before their brains have fully developed (early 20’s for males). A high school kid is still a kid, until majority at 18. He or she or whatever needs permission to use the restroom, my son, so why are schools allowing such nonsense in a lockdown environment?


As to restrooms, just have one. Who really cares? Everybody poops. It is part of the human condition. We can try to avoid it, but when you gotta go, you gotta go. A kid who thinks it’s a “T” should use whatever can is near her. Or him. Or whatever. But I digress, again.


Regardless of modern therapies, drugs, or outright butchery, boys are generally bigger and stronger than girls. There it is. I said it.


Men and women are different. Women can have babies, men cannot. And Praise The Lord for that, because if it was left up to wimpy men to carry on the human race, that race would end very soon.


A teenage boy, now matter how many questions he has about gender, should compete with boys. If he needs something to enhance his self-esteem, it should not be at the expense of girls who are working themselves to death to compete in a contest they are unlikely to win.


If that boy’s parents support this confusion, they should have their heads examined and turn in their I-Am-An-Adult cards. And stop reproducing. Get the child counselling to cope until cooler heads prevail.


My son, if your daughter, with your consent and guidance, cannot find another healthy outlet, switch schools to an institution that is not mentally and morally bankrupt.


Keep being a father, first. Protect, provide, set an example and point the way. The rest is up to your child. Something tells me she’ll be just fine. And keep the faith.

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